How you feel about yourself is the single most important factor in your overall wellbeing. It’s important, therefore, to feel right about yourself on a consistent basis, regardless of your shortcomings (past, present, or future). This can be challenging, I would agree. We learn to control a lot of things in life, but not many people have mastered the ability to control their feelings.
One thing that can get in the way of feeling right about yourself is the feeling of guilt. Most people struggle with this feeling almost every day. To help overcome this, I’d like to talk to you about “Responsibility Minus Guilt.”
The feeling of guilt is usually a reaction to something you’ve done or failed to do. The feeling can be self-inflicted, or it can be projected unto you by others. In any case, when you allow yourself to feel guilty, you’re absorbing into your system something very toxic. You don’t want that. Offering apologies or confessions won’t free you from feelings of guilt.
To live free of guilty feelings, I encourage you to practice the following:
First, learn to separate your actions from your feelings. Understand, your action and your feeling are not the same thing. Moreover, you are not your action. There’s you, and there’s your action. There’s you, and there’s your shortcomings. Do not mix the two. To experience your full potential, this is a crucial skill you need to master.
Guilty feeling is just a state of mind, not an objective reality. Regardless of what you’ve done or not done, there’s no law in the universe which requires you to feel guilty. How you feel is entirely your choice. Therefore, you can own your actions and remain unaffected by feelings of guilt.
Second, do not absorb the judgment others pass on you. People will judge you at some point, especially if they dislike something you’ve done. While you can’t always control what others say about you, you can always control how you feel. People can point accusing fingers at you, but if you feel right about yourself, their judgment will have no adverse effect on you. Remember, the degree to which a thing can affect you is proportional to the weight you attach to the thing.
Third, never be mad at yourself. Easier said than done. But, if you want to accelerate your personal and spiritual growth, you can’t skip this step. If you’re in the habit of getting mad at yourself, it’s important to stop now. Directing negative feelings at yourself will make you a candidate for all manner of diseases and misfortunes. Whenever you catch yourself getting mad at yourself, pause immediately, take a deep breath, and quiet yourself. Then, say, “I AM always kind to myself.”
In sum, always take responsibility for your actions. At the same time, however, distance yourself from all feelings of guilt. This approach to life will make you a stronger, happier person.
Feel right about yourself.
In love & light
Ogoe